MG Entry #2 - Chronicity

Name: Lori Tays Eastep
Title: CHRONICITY Genre: MG Fantasy
Word Count: 54,000

Hook:

With the help of two friends and a 400-year-old girl he may or may not have a crush on, thirteen-year-old Grim Grinnert must determine how and why he stumbled into Chronicity, the Town of Time. If he fails to find the answers before the watch strapped to his arm hits zero, they’ll send him someplace horrible… like 1932. Forever.

Line:

Grim poked his head out his bedroom window and snickered. His eight-year-old brother, Tyrus, was throwing jumbo marshmallows into the windows of passing cars and calling out, “Want s’more?”

Sinker:

Grim hated his name. It wasn’t short for Griffin, or Grissom, it was just Grim, and he’d never understood why his parents called him something that meant “extremely unpleasant.” Some kids at school, mostly girls, thought it sounded mature, but to him it just sounded depressing. Why couldn’t he have had some nice, normal, average name, one that didn’t make him stick out like a sore thumb?
But then, his parents never had been exactly average. And although the Grinnerts lived in an average town, on an average street, in an average house, it took approximately five seconds to see that they were anything but.

“HEY, KID! YOU BETTER WATCH IT!”

Grim poked his head out his bedroom window and snickered. His eight-year-old brother, Tyrus, was throwing jumbo marshmallows into the windows of passing cars and calling out, “Want s’more?”

Tyrus was a Grinnert through and through, and this afternoon he was wearing an aluminum foil hat with ears that pointed straight up, like a horse’s. Grim threw his algebra textbook onto the bed. He had quit being embarrassed by his family’s oddities long ago--at least most of the time--and this particular scene looked like it was going to be too good to miss. A few seconds later, his mother barreled out the front door.

“Tyrus Grinnert!” she yelled as she ran. “How many times have I told you not to waste your father’s aluminum foil? If you’re going to use it, make something useful, like an alien antennae!”

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**Please remember, only participating agents should comment on these posts for the duration of the contest. Any other comments, including requests from agents who aren't participating in Hook, Line & Sinker, are welcome AFTER the contest closes at 7pm EDT on Wednesday, October 24th.

5 comments:

  1. I would love to consider this full manuscript. Lori, please e-mail me the full ms, synopsis (2pg max) and your query letter containing all of the above info with your bio at marisa-at-corvisieroagency-dot-com. Thanks!

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  2. Love it! I'd like to see the first three chapters (or 50 pages), whichever is more telling, and your synopsis with the following in the subject line: HL&S MG - Number 2 - Chronicity. Please email to: Terrie(at)akaliteraryllc(dot)com.

    Thanks,
    Terrie

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  3. I love this opening. I also love this family. Please email the full manuscript, a synopsis, and your query to me at brooks(at)fineprintlit(dot)com, with "HLS Requested Material" in the subject line. Looking forward to seeing the rest!

    Brooksishly,
    me

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  4. I really loved your voice, and would love to request more on behalf of Kent Wolf at Lippincott Massie McQuilkin. Please send your first hundred pages as a Microsoft Word doc, with your query letter pasted into the first page, to amanda [at] lmqlit [dot] com. I look forward to reading your work!

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